Summary: Ianto never celebrates his birthday.
When Ianto was a boy his mum always threw him a party with brightly coloured balloons and a homemade sugary sweet birthday cake. After she died there were no more parties and that was just fine with Ianto. Birthdays were just one more thing that seemed to make his dad mad.
He celebrated one birthday with Lisa. Lisa had surprised him by filling their flat with candles. They drank wine and even years later, Ianto couldn't bring himself to drink wine without thinking about how Lisa looked in candle light.
On Ianto's birthday Ianto woke up to the smell of smoke filling his flat. Ianto grabbed the gun under his pillow and made his way through his flat; he didn't think the smoke was caused by aliens, but it never hurt to be prepared.
Ianto made his way to his kitchen to find Jack standing naked at his stove. Jack was holding a pan that was the source of the smoke.
'Jack? What are you doing?' Ianto asked setting his gun down on his coffee table.
Jack turned around. 'Just making some breakfast.'
'Oh, well that's very good.'
'If we ever get attacked by omelette shaped aliens we'll be safe,' Ianto said with a grin.
'Just practicing,' Jack said with a matching grin. 'Do you want your birthday gift?'
Ianto's eyes went wide. He knew Jack knew when his birthday was, but he didn't think Jack would want to celebrate it. As far as Ianto knew Jack didn't celebrate his own birthday, but all things considered maybe Jack didn't know when his own birthday was. Ianto couldn't help but think that this all had to do with Jack's time with The Doctor; first it was a date then it was celebrating birthdays. Ianto wondered what was next: picking out curtains maybe. The very image of Jack going to a fabric store to pick out curtains made Ianto laugh.
'What's so funny,' Jack asked.
'You never answered me. Do you want your gift.'
'Of course,' Ianto said trying to hold back a laugh.
Jack's grin went wide and he turned off stove and stepped close to Ianto.
Jack started by dropping kisses on Ianto's lips, his pheromones were faint but still a spicy scent in Ianto's nose. As Jack moved over to Ianto's neck, Ianto combed his fingers through Jack's hair and revelled in its softness.
Jack licked at Ianto's skin and moved down to Ianto's chest. As Jack nibbled on Ianto's nipple, Ianto moaned and gripped Jack's hair. Jack moved down Ianto's stomach, rubbing his nose against it.
Ianto groaned when Jack pulled down Ianto's pants freeing Ianto's hard cock. He groaned again when Jack's pink tongue came out and swirled around the head. Pheromones were coming off Jack in waves and Ianto's breathed deeply.
Jack wrapped his lips around Ianto's cock and Ianto closed his eyes. If he watched Jack, he was going to come much too soon and he wanted to make it last. Ianto felt Jack slid his mouth down Ianto's cock and than back off. Again and again he took Ianto deep. Ianto thrust his hips forward to meet Jack's mouth. As Ianto came he held Jack's head and came deep down Jack's throat.
Ianto opened his eyes just in time to see Jack wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
'That was a great birthday gift,' Ianto said.
'That wasn't your birthday gift I bought you a Top Gear hoodie, but I thought nothing said happy birthday like a morning blow job,' Jack said with a cheshire captain grin, it was like a cheshire cat grin but it was all Jack's.
As Jack stood up and gave Ianto a filthy kiss, Ianto thought maybe birthdays weren't so bad after all.
Ianto was in an abandoned building. Sunlight was streaming through broken windows and a thick layer of dust lay on the concrete floor. As Ianto watched the green and purple snake-like alien slither towards him he thought birthdays might not be bad but snakes were. Normal snakes made Ianto's skin crawl, never mind one that had to be fifteen meters long and had three orange eyes.
The snake opened it's jaws and spit a purple liquid. It landed on Ianto's shoe and the leather started to smoke. Ianto gripped his gun and ran through any ways he could get the snake to The Hub. A really big stun gun might work, stun guns worked for many things.
The snake slithered closer and Ianto gulped. Giant snakes were defiantly worse than birthdays.
Ianto was sitting inside the tourist office arranging postcards thinking about how he'd rather be doing this than fighting aliens any day of the week, he had the alien snake fang marks to prove it, when he noticed Tosh was standing behind him.
'Can I help you, Tosh?' Ianto asked.
Tosh held out a brown paper bag. 'It's nothing. It's just Gwen mentioned it was your birthday and I made you something.'
Ianto took the bag and opened it. Inside was a tie that looked like it was made of silk. As Ianto held it up the light he noticed that the colour changed from red to yellow to blue and every colour in between. Ianto felt himself smile, it was perfect and very different.
'It's wonderful, thank you.'
'You really think so?'
'Of course. I can't wait to wear it,' Ianto said as he removed his old tie and put on his new one.
Tosh smiled a smile that lit up her whole face and Ianto was struck by the thought that Tosh really should smile more.
Ianto walked into his bedroom to find a naked Jack laying on his bed. Like a snake shedding its skin Ianto removed his suit, taking special care of his new tie, until he was wearing nothing but pants.
Ianto sat down on his bed and leaned back against his pillows. Jack's hand came around Ianto's waist and started rubbing skin. Jack kissed and nibbled Ianto's ear. Ianto was too tired for sex, he had had sex with Jack a record six times that day, so he just enjoyed the feeling of Jack's warm skin against his own. As Ianto fell asleep he thought all in all birthdays weren't so bad, he still didn't want to deal with another alien snake (apparently alien snakes could be controlled by using bananas). He was going to miss those shoes though.