I need more fandoms like CKR needs more sexy (love_jackianto) wrote,
I need more fandoms like CKR needs more sexy

Torchwood, Fic, NC-17

Title: Ianto Jones and the Intergalactic Coffee Pot
Fandom: Torchwood
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: NC-17
Wordcount: 2265
Summary: After the events of Exit Wounds, Jack takes Ianto on an adventure.

Ianto was deep in the Hub washing dishes. After he had finished he took Tosh's white tea cup down from the self he kept it on and washed it too. The thin porcelain handle felt delicate under his thumb. It might have been silly, but washing cup was his's small way of keeping Tosh close, Ianto thought it was much better than keeping her in the basement of the Hub in a cyber conversion machine.

After Ianto washed the cup he put back on the shelf next to Owen's 'kiss me I'm a doctor' coffee mug. Tosh would have liked that.

Ianto stood on a roof as a cold wind blew, he pulled his coat tightly around himself. Above him stars shown and below him cars were zooming down a motor way. At his feet sat a battered brown suitcase. He didn't know exactly what Jack had planned, but Jack had sounded so excited when he told Ianto to pack a bag that Ianto had packed a little of everything. When it came to Jack one never knew.

Ianto heard the door to the roof open and the clomp of Jack's boots on concrete. Jack stood behind Ianto and Ianto leaned against Jack. Something hard pressed against Ianto's back.

'Are you ready for an adventure?' Jack asked and Ianto breathed in the cool scent of Jack's pheromones.

'That depends on what kind of adventure.'

Jack moved away from Ianto and stood in front of him. In his hands he held what looked like an old fashioned cooper coffee pot. It was tall and thin, the handle curved like a harp.

'You brought me up here just to drink coffee?' Ianto asked.

Jack grinned. 'As much as I loved coffee, this is something even better.'

Jack walked over to the edge of the roof and sat the coffee pot down. He then took a small, clear cube out from the pocket of his great coat and pushed the top. I high pitched whistling sound filled the air and the coffee pot grew in size until it was just as tall as Ianto. The top seemed to turn clear.

'It's a... a...,' Ianto said in awe.

'That's right, it's a starship. It came through the Rift last month,' Jack said grinning like a school boy that had been given a gift.

Ianto walked over to the starship and put his hand on its side. The brown metal was warm almost if it was alive. 'How come I didn't know about this?'

'I wanted it to be a surprise. After Tosh and Owen died I thought we could use a holiday.'

Hearing Jack talk about Tosh and Owen brought Ianto out of his awe and the practical part of his brain took over. He removed his hand from the starship and damn if he didn't feel colder than he had been before. 'We can't leave. Who will watch the Rift?'

Jack came up behind Ianto and put his hands around Ianto's waist. 'That's the other part of my surprise. I hope you don't mind, but I hired a new team and put Gwen in charge. If there are any problems the starship will fly back to the Hub.'

Ianto turned around to face Jack 'Really? You did all this without me knowing?'

'Really.' Jack took Ianto hand. 'So Mr Jones, are you ready to sees things you've never imagined?'

Ianto looked at Jack. Jack was grinning from ear to ear, the corner of his eyes were crinkled . Ianto hadn't seen Jack smile like that since Tosh and Owen died and Ianto suddenly felt very tired. As much as he didn't want to leave Torchwood maybe a holiday would do them both some good.

When Ianto stepped inside the spaceship he was amazed by how big it was. From the outside it looked like it would be barely big enough to hold both him and Jack but once inside it was bigger than Ianto's flat. Looking around, Ianto was struck by how (almost) normal everything looked. The walls and floor were made of the same brown metal as the outside, grey metal tubes ran along the ceiling. In the middle of the floor sat a wooden table and two over stuffed green chairs. A closer look at the chairs reveled that instead of fabric, they were made of a green scaly material.

Ianto dropped his bag of the floor and made his way to the other side of the ship. He was admiring the wall, a warmth spread up his arm when he touched it, when all of a sudden a panel slid open with a whoosh. Ianto looked inside to find a bedroom. The room was completely white and a large four post bed sat in the middle of the room. Ianto ran his fingers over the bed frame. The frame was a deep purple wood with alien creatures curved into it. The blankets and pillows on the bed were as white as the room and the air smelt faintly sweet.

'Like your room?' Jack asked behind Ianto.

'Very much. Did you pick out the bed?'

Jack laughed. 'Afraid not, it came with the ship. You know it's bad luck not to christen a bed in a ship.'

Ianto turned around and felt himself grin. He knew where this was going but he couldn't resist playing with Jack.

'Oh really, and how exactly does one christen a bed?' Ianto asked as he loosened his tie and Jack removed his coat.

'Come here and I'll show you,' Jack said as he moved closer to Ianto until they were almost nose to nose.

Jack pushed Ianto and Ianto fell onto the bed with a bounce. Jack removed his braces and fell on top of Ianto. Jack's lips met Ianto's and Ianto put his hands in Jack hair. Jack's tongue licked at Ianto mouth and Ianto let Jack's tongue in. As their tongue's brushed against each other and Jack's pheromones filled the air Ianto felt himself harden. Jack broke the kiss and slid down Ianto's body. He unzipped Ianto's trousers and pulled out Ianto's cock. Jack licked the underside of Ianto's cock from bottom to top, letting his tongue rest on top of the dark red head. Ianto hips snapped upward and damn if Jack wasn't grinning like a smug bastard.

'Please,' Ianto tried to say in a steady voice but it came out as a whine.

'Please what?' Jack said as he tighten his grip of the Ianto cock until Ianto let out a moan.

'Please suck me. Please.'

Jack licked the tip of Ianto's cock. 'Well since you asked so nicely.'

Jack wrapped his lips around Ianto's cock and started to suck. His hand traveled up and down the shaft. Ianto's hips snapped up and Jack stroked faster and sucked harder. After several moments Ianto closed his eyes tightly and came.

After Ianto's orgasm subsided he looked up at Jack and held out his arms. Jack fell into Ianto arms and Ianto rubbed Jack's back, Jack's shirt was soft against Ianto's fingers. Before Ianto fell asleep he thought maybe taking a hoiday wasn't such a bad idea, that and that he was going to suck Jack off after they woke up. Fair was fair, after all.

Ianto stood in the doorway of the ship and looked out. They had landed in a field of purple grass. Off in the distance a village could be seen, the puffs of smoke from chimneys hung above the village like gray clouds. Jack was busy inside the ship so Ianto thought he'd look around the village. Even though said the aliens were friendly, Ianto put his gun in his hoister just in case. Old habits died hard and all that.

Ianto walked to the village. The 'village' looked to be one big bazaar. Stalls made of wood and strew stood in two rows and a stone pathway cut through the middle. Aliens of all shapes and size were walking around and none of them paid Ianto any attention. It felt a little strange to be around aliens that didn't want to kill him, but he tried to shake the feeling. All thing considered Ianto should consider himself the alien

Ianto stopped in front of one stall that was covered in brightly colored fabrics. As he moved around the stall, the material changed colours from red to blue to yellow and back again.

'You like? Good prices we have,' the owner of the stall asked. He was a tall white dog-like creature dressed only in a top hat with and pink and purple flower stuck to the side.

Ianto let his fingers move over soft cloth. He was trying to decide what fabric he might like to buy when a bolt of white caught his eye. He picked it up and when he did it seemed to ripple in his hands.

'What is this?' Ianto asked.

'That psychic fabric. You think, it becomes.'

Ianto considered that. Having fabric that could become anything he wanted would certainly save him on shirts.

'How much is it?'

The dog creature seemed to consider Ianto. 'We trade. You give shirt.'

Ianto blushed as he took off his suit jacket and unbuttoned his shirt.

Ianto walked back to the ship. The sun warmed his bare chest. He had tried to turn the psychic fabric into a shirt but he couldn't get to quite work and just wearing his suit jacket seem a little ridiculous. Ianto heard Jack whistle.

'If I had known you were going to come back shirtless I would have went with you,' Jack said as he walked out of the ship up to Ianto and placed a kiss on Ianto's lips.

'Very funny. Do you know how to make psychic fabric work?'

'Do I Let me see it.'

Jack took the fabric from Ianto and closed his eyes. Before Ianto's eyes the fabric rippled and changed into a pale blue dress shirt. When Ianto tired it on it was a little tight around the chest but then it was Jack who had made the shirt.

'Could you teach me how to use it,' Ianto asked.

'Of course. Let's make some coffee and I'll give you a quick lesson.'

As Ianto walked back to the ship Jack put his arm around Ianto's shoulder and kissed the side of Ianto's face.
'... and that was how I ended up in a orgy on HGRE-4,' Jack said.

Stars shown and a two yellow moons hung in the sky. Jack was sitting on the ground and Ianto was between his legs. They were watching bright red flames dance in a fire pit and Jack's hands kept sliding down Ianto arms. Ianto breathed deeply the scent of Jack's pheromones mixed the cinnamon scent of the air. The bazaar and closed down for the night and aliens were milling around just outside the village.

'Want me to show you something wonderful,' Jack asked.

'Now is not the time for you to pull out your cock.'

Jack laughed. 'No, not that. Although that's not a bad idea. See that fire? They don't use wood, but a special wine that burns for hours.'

'That is wonderful. That's...' Ianto couldn't finish his thought because a strange slurping sound filled the air. He felt Jack tense up behind him.

'Damn,' Ianto heard Jack say.

'What is it?' Ianto asked as Jack pulled Ianto to his feet and they started running along with all the other people around them.

'I can't explain right now, but this is really bad.'

They ran up a hill and Ianto turned around to see bright green slim moving into the village. The slime knocked down the stalls and any food on the ground disappeared when they slid over it.

'What the hell?' Ianto asked no one in particular.

'They're splag,' Jack said behind him. 'We are so fucked. They eat everything, including people.'

Ianto took a deep breath and looked around. There had to be a way out of this. He hadn't come to a whole another planet just to be eaten by slim. As Ianto watched the splag knocked over a lantern in the village and didn't go near the fire on the ground, an idea started to form in his mind. Ianto went up to the leader of the village, they had met the day before, she was a woman with big, black eyes and pale yellow skin dressed in a long red robe tied with a bright red sash.

'Do you have any more wine,' Ianto asked trying to block out the slurping sound that was getting louder.

The leader looked confused. Where Ianto told her his plan she said 'I do,' grinning a grin that showed her purple teeth.

Ianto took bottle after bottle of wine and poured it on the ground when Jack realized what Ianto had planned, he also poured out the wine until all the everyone was surrounded by a circle of wine. Ianto lit the wine on fire just as the splag where coming over the hill. As red flames danced as high as Ianto was tall, the splag slid across the ground. Ianto thought his plan was working, not a single splag came near the fire, when a large dark green splag reared up a bellowed. Ianto went for his gun automatically but the splag didn't come any closer.

After the splag left everyone cheered and patted Ianto on the back but the only thing he remembered about that night was Jack grinning at him. That was memory Ianto would never forget.
Tags: fic, jack/ianto, series: the intergalactic coffee pot, torchwood

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